5 Steps to a Better Burger

 

HI!

*waves wildly*

GUYS I'M SITTING DOWN TO WRITE A POST. (I see you giving me that look, Chowboy. Hush.)

Lots of life has been going on but blogging hasn't (obviously, duh) so I should probably do a life update at some point (if people even read those anymore...I like instagram, y'all, but it's just not the same as reading a blog post.)(not that I actually read any blog posts anymore #unfortunate)(but does anyone else get really nostalgic whenever they read an old blog post? Or like when you see an old blogger friend on some other kind of social media and go "awwww I remember when we both posted weekly and commented on each other's stuff and had insanely long email threads about our favorite books"??)

Wowwww I'm feeling sentimental just writing this.

Anyway. All that to say, if y'all think a life update is overdue, then I might try to get one up within the next 6 months...maybe.

SO. That was a bunny trail. *cough* Anyway. Burgers.

A lot of my life revolves around food. I do a lot of cooking. I don't love cooking (though I like it more than I used to) but I do love eating so I feel like it balances itself out well. And one of my favorite foods to eat (besides tacos) is burgers. And while I'm definitely not an expert (I still procrastinate so long that I end up charring my burgers to get them done on time sometimes) I have found a few tips to just making that burger m e l t in your mouth.

I didn't take the time to actually take pictures of all of these steps, so if you're here for the aesthetically-pleasing-food-blogger-photos, there's the door. No pictures, just text (so if my brothers actually made it this far, congratulations, but I'm sorry, it's going to remain boring). (but it's food so it can't really be boring, can it?)

Five Steps for Making the Perfect Burger:

1. Thicker is better

We used to make 1/4lb burgers, but when the boys got big and two of those didn't fill 'em up, we started going bigger, and by that I mean 1/3lb burgers. That's a big hunk of meat right there, y'all, so don't be stingy when you shape your patty. It'll look HUGE (and if you're someone who doesn't eat much, disregard this point completely) but meat cooks down, don't worry. (and if you're like my brother and you like paper-thin burgers that are practically skillet scrapings, then...you have no clue what you're missing)(he loves Freddy's, in case you were wondering)

2. DON'T SMASH THAT PATTY

This is, quite possibly, my biggest tip. The urge is to smash the patty with your spatula to get it nice and flat and get it cooking faster—and the flatter the burger, the easier to know when to flip (and to make sure the middle doesn't stay raw). Don't do it. I repeat: don't do it. Smashing the patty squeezes all the juices out and you're left with a dry burger. SAVE THAT JUICE! I used to smash my burgers. But then my dad taught me the trick to knowing when to flip a burger: the juice! When you don't squeeze the juice out, it'll tell you when it's time! When the juice starts running out the top of the burger, that basically means (I guess?? I'm just basically giving an educated guess at this point) that the bottom is sealed off and it's time to flip it! And then you'll pretty much know when the burger is done when the color on the bottom matches the top. (kinda. You just basically get a feel for it.)

3. Low & slow

Don't rush the burgers (remember when I said that I often end up searing my burgers to get them done on time? Don't be like me. It tastes better that way). I know that all stovetops are different, so I'll just say to figure out a good temperature that allows your burgers to cook slowly and stew in their juices. (I'll often take 30 minutes or more, depending on how many patties I've got on my griddle...but our stove is over 30 years old, soooo it's got *personality*)

4. Lawry's seasoned salt

This isn't sponsored (me? Sponsored? That's a funny one). I just love Lawry's seasoned salt. My grandma swears by it, and y'all know that if your grandma says a certain food brand is the best...it just is. Because grandmas are legends in the kitchen and they're just superior. Lawry's seasoned salt just...tastes better. I've used other salt, but it's just not the same. So. Grind some pepper on that patty and sprinkle on some Lawry's and you're good to go!

5. Paper towels

Trust me on this one. Once you have your burger assembled (burger, bun, cheese, ketchup, whatever you put on it), wrap that baby in a paper towel. No joke, I'm pretty sure my family's favorite thing about summer is that we start taking burgers to the field, because we wrap the burgers in paper towels. I don't know exactly what it is, but something about the way it locks in all the moisture and mixes all of the flavors together just...*chef's kiss* No joke. We literally get excited about it (because who wants to waste money on paper towels if you're just gonna eat in the house anyway??)

So there you have it! Five steps to a perfect burger. If you already implement these tips, I'M SO PROUD OF YOU. If you have other tips, PLEASE LET ME KNOW because I'm always happy to improve my skills.

Okay, I'm probably gonna just hit that post button without editing this post because honestly y'all, I'm tired of typing. Peace out, kids! *flashes the peace sign and exits the chat*